Luke 14: 15-24

¹⁵ One of those eating with him heard this. So he said to Jesus, “The person who will be at the banquet in God’s kingdom is blessed.”

¹⁶ Jesus said to him, “A man gave a large banquet and invited many people. ¹⁷ When it was time for the banquet, he sent his servant to tell those who were invited, ‘Come! Everything is ready now.’

¹⁸ “Everyone asked to be excused. The first said to him, ‘I bought a field, and I need to see it. Please excuse me.’ ¹⁹ Another said, ‘I bought five pairs of oxen, and I’m on my way to see how well they plow. Please excuse me.’ ²⁰ Still another said, ‘I recently got married, and that’s why I can’t come.’

²¹ “The servant went back to report this to his master. Then the master of the house became angry. He told his servant, ‘Run to every street and alley in the city! Bring back the poor, the handicapped, the blind, and the lame.’

²² “The servant said, ‘Sir, what you’ve ordered has been done. But there is still room for more people.’

²³ “Then the master told his servant, ‘Go to the roads and paths! Urge the people to come to my house. I want it to be full. ²⁴ I can guarantee that none of those invited earlier will taste any food at my banquet.’ ”

I am grateful today for Pastor Mary Hughes to be officiating this service because I am going to do the very thing that I avoid doing when it is me. I’m going to share more of my memories than I think a pastor should at a funeral.

You guys weren’t planning on getting together this Christmas were you? When was the last time this family didn’t have a Christmas dinner together? Paul’s last message to us. As the last of an entire generation of our family now stands proudly at God’s side, we are reminded of that which Paul quietly whispered to us. Family gets together at the holidays. All who can gather in the Lord’s name and share a meal together. And those who eat together, are our family.

Our family, despite its losses, is growing. Tiny humans many of whom I struggle to match names to scurry about making noise. It’s a beautiful sound. Every time I hear an adult yell at them to be quiet I remember my generation and that wonderful little wooden shoebox toy with a hammer and wooden nails that we used to play with at Great Grandma Freier’s house when we were young. The sound takes me back each holiday shared. Paul loved to watch the children play from his nieces and nephews, to his own children, to his great nieces and nephews, to his great-great nieces and nephews.

As I was trying to picture in my head from my very limited memories, Uncle Paul, I kept thinking to myself, he was like Santa Claus. I knew so little about him but that chuckle of his pierced through the air, unmistakable. A beautiful reminder of family I didn’t know that well but still held dear to my heart.

There were two of us, Katherine and myself. Two of them, Val and Chris, and one Dan. We grew up together miles and miles apart. The only time we ever each other collectively were for family meals. Tiny aunt Barb and giant Uncle Paul. I had no hesitation marrying a man a foot taller than me. It’s funny how when we sit back and look at life the things that influences us that we weren’t paying attention to.

There’s a lot of people gathered here that I don’t know particularly well and I know you don’t know me particularly well, but you’re my family. Even those who do not share blood or a last name. Paul was a community man. If he could help you, he would. If something was broken he would… make it work.

I’m not sure how many of you have noticed this as you have gotten older, but our family is weird. And not weird the way others families are weird, we’re special in our weirdness. Very unique. We could quite possibly be the dorkiest family I know. We were nerds before being nerds was cool. We go against the grain of society. We are socially awkward at our core. We are like this giant collection of people that no one else wants to sit with at lunch, with a few scattered exceptions. And so, God gave us each other.

Every holiday, an entire band of strange, socially awkward people gathered together with others that included them no matter how quiet, how intelligent, how crafty, how ingenious, how weird they were. This family gave them a place where they could feel like they belonged a place where they were no longer the smartest person in the room. Someone else could do something they could not, or do something better. A place where you could hear stories about others and their uniqueness. It saddens me now that I missed the opportunity to sit and hear Paul’s tales of the Philippine’s and the military service he was so proud of.

But, as one generation passes and another rises. Family gets together because they need each other. For some, they are having families of their own now, they have acquired spouses and dragged them into our mess, and are now having children of their own, poor little souls who have no choice but to be a part of us. The holidays are getting busier. This happened when I was growing up too, when tiny cousins started appearing, but we continued to gather because of Paul and his siblings.

Not every family grows at the same rate you see. While some of us have large families with lots of children who are close in their relationships, others have children who live rather solitary existences that do not have those opportunities to have a pile of siblings and cousins as friends. And, without these family dinners, they become isolated and forget that they are not alone. A few times a year, everyone gathers so that no one feels alone at the holiday. Paul and his siblings all knew this. It is because of their diligence that I know any of you at all.

Paul was a Christian; he attended church quite regularly for funerals and weddings. Because what happens at funerals and weddings? Family gets together. A great many of us are outcasts; we don’t fit into molds very well. We are cut from a different cloth, thanks to those who came before us, who made us unique in our ways. In this family, everyone is included.

If you’re a lot to take in at one time, we’ll alternate who gets to sit and talk with you for a while. We’ll all take turns to make sure you feel seen and included. That’s what I was taught by Paul and because I get to stand up here in front of all of you today, that’s the story you get to hear because to me, there is nothing more Christ-like than inviting everyone to the table even if you aren’t welcome anywhere else, at this family’s table, we will always pull up a chair for you. We will include you. But most importantly, there must be a table to invite people to..

Paul’s generation, I pray, instilled in each and every one of you that we gather at holidays not for ourselves, but for those who might not have a holiday dinner to go to. Who might not have a loud, noisy family to gather with. It made me proud this year how quickly you responded to making sure that Paul was able to come comfortably to our Thanksgiving meal. That’s the family I know and grew up with. A family where if one of you loves someone, we will all love them, we will all include them, even if we think they’re weird.

The problem we have also run into in each and every generation is that as our own individual families grow, we want to spend more time with them and celebrate more with them. And while that doesn’t really seem like a problem, it is. Because every time a banquet is called…

¹⁶ Jesus said to him, “A man gave a large banquet and invited many people. ¹⁷ When it was time for the banquet, he sent his servant to tell those who were invited, ‘Come! Everything is ready now.’

¹⁸ “Everyone asked to be excused. The first said to him, ‘I bought a field, and I need to see it. Please excuse me.’ ¹⁹ Another said, ‘I bought five pairs of oxen, and I’m on my way to see how well they plow. Please excuse me.’ ²⁰ Still another said, ‘I recently got married, and that’s why I can’t come.’

I look back over the years and I think of all the excuses I have made to not go. Maybe I was at school, or the drive was too far, or I had to work, or I just wanted to spend time with my immediate family. As I was writing this sermon, I checked off those boxes.

I just bought a blank and I needed to see to it. Check.

I just got a blank and I need to make sure everything is up and running smoothly. Check.

I just started a relationship and that’s why I can’t come. Check.

The Bible is cruel sometimes, isn’t it? Pointing out our fallacy in every way, shape, and form. Everything we try to brush off. Everything we try to hide. Every excuse we have tried to justify has already been given, and Jesus Christ tells us… “nope.” Just that. One word. Nope.

There’s this card game called Exploding Kittens that one of my nieces loves to play, and it has in it a “nope card. The “Nope” card can be played to cancel out any move any player tries to make no matter whose turn it is. Jesus has an entire hand of “nope” cards, and it would seem he gave one to Paul. We tried to not get together for a holiday, and Paul just said “nope.”

I pray that never changes. I pray that the message that Paul has conveyed with his last breath, stays with each and every person in this room and with those who were unable to be here today. Gatherings matter. This matters. Being here together matters. Funerals, weddings, holidays, whatever all matter. For some, this might be the last social occasion they attend for months, but because they are here today and will share a meal together after the burial, for one more year, they will remember they belong to something bigger than themselves.

So Paul has played his final “nope” card as a reminder to us. Family eats together at the holidays. Family prays together. Family includes everyone who is invited. If one of us loves you, all of us will love you. If you show up, we will feed you, we will welcome you. If you don’t belong with anyone else, you belong with us.

So thank you, Great Uncle Paul, for reminding me why I moved here, as apparently I needed yet one more reminder. I thought I had it under control, but nope, I did not. I invite each and every one of you to hang out here for a little while, as those who are able will go with me to the cemetery to commit Paul back to the dust God shaped him ever so beautifully from. After which, we will return for a Christmas dinner. A celebration of Paul Freier’s life, family, friends, community, and the love of Jesus Christ together. And I will look forward to seeing all of you again at Easter.  All are invited because we know, “The person who will be at the banquet in God’s kingdom is blessed.”

Paul Freier

1937 – 2025

Paul George Freier age 88 of Ocqueoc passed away peacefully on December 11, 2025.

He was born March 3, 1937, in a cabin in French Town (Onaway) to Sterling and Marie (Hawkins) Freier.

On October 18, 1969, he married Barbara Buehrer in Wauseon, Ohio. Paul served in the United States Navy from 1956 – 1960. His first years were spent with his grandparents at the Hammond Bay Coast Guard Station. He attended the Glawe School. Paul worked for Oldsmobile before and after serving in the Navy. He owned and operated Huron Beach Marathon from 1970 until his passing. He was one of the original members of the Ocqueoc Bearinger Fire Department, retiring with over 25 years of dedicated service. He enjoyed woodworking and spending time at camp.

Paul is survived by his daughter, Valerie Freier of Rogers City; nieces and nephews, Marianne (Jim) Dougherty, Susan (Gary) Oliverson, Lisa (Ron) Freel, Dan (Lori) Olmsted, Brian Freier and Randy Freier; as well as many great nieces and nephews.

He was preceded in death by his wife, Barbara; son, Christopher; siblings, Wesley Freier, Hazel (Mort) Olmsted and Melvin Freier.

Friends may visit at Trinity Lutheran Church in Ocqueoc on Saturday, December 20th from 10 a.m. through time of his memorial service at 11 a.m. with Pastor Mary Hughes and his niece, Pastor Jennifer Sayers officiating. Rogers City VFW Post 607 will offer a military tribute immediately following.

Inurnment will take place at the Old Methodist Cemetery in Ocqueoc Township.

Memorials may be given to Hospice of Michigan in memory of Paul Freier.

Online condolences may be addressed through http://www.beckfuneralhome.org